Life

10 Problems Only Interns Will Understand

Despite the Catholic Church's stance on the subject, you know Limbo is real and that it's really called an "internship". It exists when you are caught between being a student and having an actual job. It's the harsh reality of the modern workplace and we know many of you out there are enduring it. Remember, you're not alone. We've already recognised the issues which face the overwhelmingly endowed and the unreasonably attractive, now we're acknowledging the woefully underpaid with these 10 problems only interns will understand:

10) You have vague memories of having money once. Alas, it's now little more than a glorious dream.

9) From all the bitching being done, you and your fellow interns have grown as close as convicts on a chain gang.

8) When people ask what your job is you have to explain it's actually an internship and you watch powerlessly as their eyes glaze over and they slowly back out of the room.

7) You hear phrases bandied about like "the intern will do it", reminding you that you are in fact a subhuman dog's body.

6) Therefore the shittiest jobs are your department. Which is obviously invaluable experience!

5) Among these formative duties is the ever-demeaning coffee run, just so you don't forget what you are.

4) Oh, you have an opinion on how things should be done? Good for you. Pity it's totally invalid. And where the fuck is my coffee?

3) Getting an internship is as cutthroat as trying to get an actual real-person job because, in a Kafkaesque twist, you haven't got enough experience to get experience.

2) Sometimes you forget you got into this for a reason and you feel like you're just gonna throw in the towel and bail.

1) Well, at least you've learned one new thing during your internship: intern is actually a synonym for little bitch.

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Seán has been told by some that he resembles a young Hugh Laurie, but more people have tried to hire him as a Noddy impersonator. Something of a film fan, a pub quiz is one of the few situations in which he is even remotely useful. Seán enjoys the occasional beverage of the alcohol variety, Salt & Vinegar crisps, and referring to himself in the third person.