Life

26 Existential Crises Every College Second Year Fears

This time of year third years seem to be getting all of the attention. Sure they're the ones actually leaving, but what about us poor second years! Whilst they can relax having completed all of their exams, we are faced with the brutal knowledge that we still have all of it to come.

We now face a torturous summer of inner turmoil while we ponder our futures. It may seem like we've had it sweet this year, but from here on in it's nothing but stress, change, and responsibility.

As this decisive turning point in our lives hits us harder than a wet-fish-slap, let's look at some of the major existential crises that every second year is going through at this time of year.

1. All of my third year friends are graduating

2. I thought exam season was bad this year, how on earth will I cope next year?

3. After next year, no more lie-ins - like ever

4. I can't go to work hungover?!

5. This is literally the beginning of the rest of my life

You sure as hell better be stressed!

6. Next year all my friends will go back to living all over the country

Maybe I should drop everyone who lives more than 20 miles away and start making more convenient friends. There's still time right?

7. Next year will be the hardest, and it counts the most!

What kind of a sadist thought that was a good idea?

8. I have to start work on my dissertation now

Not tomorrow, not after breakfast, now.

9. This could be my last long, free summer ever

Or maybe until retirement age - but that's like 50 years away!

10. Next year I won't be able to drink as much

But most of my social relationships here are founded upon drinking. Are we doomed to sit in total silence for the whole of next year?

11. Who am I without education?

Education is all I've known my whole life, and next year it's over. Don't take that away from me!

12. Next year I might have to move back home

13. After next year I will be a ... proper adult

Curse you responsibility!

14. Only three student loans instalments left!

I only know how to budget based on three lump sums of income!

15. The end of student overdrafts and discounts

But, but, how will I live?

16. I only have one year left of 'ahh screw it I'm a student' excuses

The end of the perfect get out of jail free card.

17. Loads of my friends are going on years abroad/in industry

When will I ever see them again!?

18. What if this was my peak, and it's all downhill from now?

*Googles map to Neverland*

19. I only have one year left to find my dream husband/wife at uni

Perhaps crazy cat lady really is the best option.

20. And this is the year all of your friends in relationships will get REALLY loved up with

Cue watching tv alone with a bucket of ice cream.

21. I just can't deal with the slow approach of change, OK!

22. Employers will be judging me!

I have to start applying for grad schemes and jobs. Must. Check. CV.

23. Entering the dreaded twenties

They'll create an age reversal machine soon though, right?

24. What if I don't have time to complete my university bucket list?

25. The sudden realisation that you have done nothing of cultural value in your university's city yet.

26. This time next year, I will be free!

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