The 5 Joys Of An Irish Christmas
Well it’s that time of year again. The mad rush to buy something anything, for the people you love. Our pockets, if not already empty from paying rent and buying ourselves food. That being because we are no longer under the care of our parents and cast out into college world. Sigh. My argument would be to forget everybody else and buy yourself something you really want and need. How can anyone be disappointed then? Maybe some might not agree, but along with receiving presents (you couldn’t really care if you never got in your entire lifetime). It wouldn’t be Christmas, if it didn’t include this and come with a fare few other annoyances just to top off the holiday season. But what are the five most not so joyous things we can expect for Christmas?
1. Well firstly, we are all going to gain about a stone in weight. But can we really be blamed? Look at all the lovely food we are surrounded by. Not to mention the odd tin of Roses, here and there.
2. You should expect to receive one of the following from a relative: Socks, Lynx, bath/shower set etc. Don’t forget to smile and be appreciative, even though you already have about a million and one pairs of socks. Oh the joy.
3. Joy to the world, the teacher’s dead…wait, that isn’t right? Even if you don’t have the lyrics exactly right to every Christmas song created. The tune will still float around in your head for days. So be prepared and learn the lyrics now as not to embarrass yourself further.
4. Church. If you are a Catholic, it is probably the one time of the year you feel you have to prove it. You do this by attending an extra long mass service.
5. Movies. How many more times do we have to watch Elf, Santa Claus and or Home Alone? A million more times it seems. Please, please somebody produce a new Christmas film.
Even with all of these pet peeves, we could take light of the situation and remember that it is a time of the year that we just can’t avoid. As Tallahassee from the movie Zombieland once said. “It’s time to nut up or shut up”. No complaining is allowed. Even if you still have no idea what to buy for your relatives/other half. Calling them awkward over and over again isn’t going to solve your present buying problem for you. And neither is “handmaking something”. Be prepared, that is all.