The Girl's Guide To The Perfect First Date
First Dates eh? Anxiety ridden affairs for the most part, but they don't have to be. College Times has set out a blueprint for all you gals looking to complete a successful first date.
1) Be Flirty Yet Aloof
Always keep him guessing. Compliment his looks and then hide behind a potted plant for five minutes. He won't know where he stands.
2) Be Revealing Yet Prudish
It's the classic conundrum, you want to look your best but you also don't want him to think you're easy. So meet yourself halfway with a low cut nuns habit. Bingo.
3) Pay for the Meal
Do a chivalry 180 and demand to pay for his meal, if he refuses then throw your purse in his face and scarper.
4) Arrive Late
An hour should do it. Straight away you've assumed the dominant role in the relationship. For real results wait two hours. And for best results don't go at all.
5) Laugh At His Terrible Anecdotes
If you don't it's gonna a totes awky mo-mo. Even if his anecdotes are in poor taste and borderline racist it's still better than a long drawn out silence.
6) Initiate Some 'Footsie'
Start with a playful caress of the inner leg, then introduce a ball to proceedings. Using the legs of your chairs as a goal, challenge him to a winner takes all footsie deathmatch. First one to five goals wins.
7) Play Dumb
Men are notoriously scared of smart women, so don't get too high falutin on him. If he asks you what two plus two is, shrug and say 'do I look like a calculator?'
8) Have Another Date Lined Up In Case The First One Goes To Shit
Always good to have a plan b, girls.
9) Take Him To A Dark Place
A moodily lit restaurant preferably. That way if the date starts to go south he won't be able to see the familiar face of regret.
10) Bring Your Friend
Have a sidekick on hand to steer the conversation, suss out your date and, if needs be, create a diversion so you can make a quick getaway.
11) Abandon Etiquette
Let your man know you're not too prim. Get those elbows on the table, chew with your mouth open & belch and fart with carefree abandon.