Life

Things You Will Learn In Your First Real World Job

So soon it will time to graduate and gain some responsibility (not too much we hope) and in doing so enter into your first real world job after college. Bills, mortgages and other grown up things are well on their way to you but first you need to safely negotiate the early stages of a career path that will hopefully lead you to much success. However, you won't just need all your qualifications, you will mainly need social skills. People can be narky, stupid and just plain ignorant and you will soon learn this....however these tips will keep you well ahead of the game in knowing what to expect.

Wages

You'll be paid a whole lot less than you think PAYE, USC, cycle to work scheme (which probably will seem like a good idea at the time but you'll probably use the bike twice), pension funds etc etc etc. Making sure that 50k gross per year dream job straight out of college becomes 5k once everything else is squeezed out of it.

Co workers

Some of them won't like you, it's natural, but try to learn from them. All they see is this self proclaimed hot shot coming straight out of college whereas more than likely you're a diamond in the rough and need to be cut and polished before you can be left to your own devices. OR maybe your new employers will polish you up real nice so you think your ready but keep you on the shelf for a few years as they need to keep the market value of your position consistent..Wait, I lost track there, am I talking about post graduation or de beers diamonds...oh well, lets move on.

Your Boss

He or she may have been on the interview panel, and may have asked you personal questions in order to assess your suitability for the position but don't for a second think that they didn't forget your name the second you walked out the door. You will have to start all over again once you start. You may be making coffee for a while...and maybe, just maybe, your new boss showed none of their true nature at the interview and they are in fact....a prick

Don't stand still

Technology is changing everyday, exponentially and the days of getting locked into a civil service position for life are becoming less and less. Self  improvement and up-skilling are the key to you staying relevant while moving forward. So take advantage of any courses or seminars that will better you. If you stand still you'll become an unmotivated drone!

Bringing in lunch

You probably learned this in school but keep the smelly lunches to a minimum. Healthy, scentless food will in the long run be better for you in both popularity and health situations. The alternative is bringing in a big dirty curry and smelling like tumeric 24/7.

Gossip

The water cooler conversations as they are now well known throughout the world. Learn to keep your comments neutral and rarely gossip about people in your new work. You don't know how long the person you are speaking to has been there or where the allegiance lies. Just nod and smile people, nod and smile!

Inter office relationships

Look it's going to happen, people just can't control themselves and always make extremely poor choices...whether it's a late night drunken mistake or a frolic on the photocopier at the office party (cliche, I know!) but just make sure it doesn't hinder you. The fewer people know the better. You don't want to become the gossipee do you?

Take the right "sick days" off

Some people never take a day off, some people do. But unless you have your spine hanging out maybe don't take a Monday off after a massive weekend on the piss. Go in, and deal with everything "the fear" has to throw at you. The odd Monday is fine of course but repetition will be noted, unless of course you just use all your holidays to book Mondays off...but then you'll have no holiday...oooh decisions, decisions.

Office parties

Please be on your best behaviour at these events. It's so easy to swallow a bit too much eggnog at the Christmas party and deliver a few home truths about your boss, while then giving his secretary a good seeing to in the bathroom and knocking out one of the delivery driver because "he looked funny at you". That kind of sh!t will land you straight in HR on your first day back.

You will make mistakes

Ask questions, because everybody makes mistakes. If you keep your mouth shut you will walk head first into these mistakes without taking the initiative to ask someone who could've given you a heads up!

Enjoy yourself and make some friends

In this climate a job is a job, but make sure you are happy as well, there is no point in being somewhere that has a direct relation to you being depressed or worse. Stress is one thing but plain being in a rut is another and if you're unhappy look further a field. Don't feel like you're trapped because if you're content in misery you're well on your way to becoming a miserable old fart and not too many people will have sympathy for you!

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Ian is a contributing writer for CollegeTimes. He is currently partying his ass off for the Summer having spent the past 7 years at various colleges across the globe. While by no means an athlete, he considers himself a world class darts player... If you tweet him he will not respond.