The actor and comedian, Aziz Ansari has spoken for the first time about the allegations of sexual impropriety made against him in an article on Babe.net last year. The article concerned an anonymous woman who said she'd been on a date with Ansari. It describes how she and Ansari returned to his apartment following their dinner, where she felt pressured by him into engaging in sexual activity.
She described how, after crying about the incident on her way home, she texted the comedian making her feelings known, saying "Last night might've been fun for you, it wasn't for me... you ignored clear non-verbal cues; you kept going with advances... I just want to take this moment to make you aware of this behaviour and how uneasy it made me."
In response to this text he apologised to her texting her saying, "I'm so sad to hear this. Clearly, I misread things in the moment and I'm truly sorry."
Ansari, spoke out about the incident in public for the first time on Monday at a pop-up show he was performing at the Village Underground in New York. He outlined to the audience his reasons for having not spoken out publicly on the incident for over a year, as well as expressing his contrition and offering his thoughts on what he'd learned.
He began by saying that he needed time to process the incident before adding, "it's a terrifying thing to talk about".
There were times I felt really upset and humiliated and embarrassed, and ultimately I just felt terrible this person felt this way.
But you know, after a year, how I feel about it is, I hope it was a step forward. It made me think about a lot, and I hope I’ve become a better person.
If that has made not just me but other guys think about this, and just be more thoughtful and aware and willing to go that extra mile, and make sure someone else is comfortable in that moment, that’s a good thing.
And I think it also just gave me perspective on my life.
There was a moment where I was scared that I’d never be able to do this again.
But now, I really mean it. I mean it on a different level. You canceled whatever you were supposed to do tonight, and you came out in the cold, and you waited in line, and you put your phone in a stupid pouch.
You did all this shit just to hear me talk for an hour and some change, and it means the world to me, so thank you so much.
The reaction to his words has been largely positive, with people, not necessarily forgiving him, but at least accepting that he is attempting to negotiate the situation with as much tact and grace as the situation allows. Aside from his overt contrition over what happened, he has evidently given serious thought to the incident and endeavoured to let it help him grow as a person.
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After all the hand wringing over whether the Ansari story meant #MeToo had gone “too far”, here is Ansari saying that he thinks it helped him and others gain important perspective. Nice to see him address it directly. https://t.co/Is7IkOyx5I
— Emily Rose Fisher (@emfish55) February 12, 2019
last night at his show in nyc, aziz addressed the sexual misconduct allegations against him in a really thoughtful way. i wish more men would do the same. https://t.co/KVh4484Tad
— Anna Silman (@annaesilman) February 12, 2019
Glad to see Aziz begin to reflect on and reckon with the allegations that came out against him last year. I wish this sort of reflection would happen more often. https://t.co/Cmye1mlQ8x
— Emma Gray (@emmaladyrose) February 12, 2019
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I think Aziz Ansari is very thoughtful here and I hope there is space for understanding and forgiveness https://t.co/2uOLjYF5jr
— Patricia Arquette (@PattyArquette) February 13, 2019
However, while it is evidently a step forward, at the very least for an individual toward becoming more attuned to the consequences of their actions, it is by no means an exoneration.
I think Aziz Ansari is very thoughtful here and I hope there is space for understanding and forgiveness https://t.co/2uOLjYF5jr
— Patricia Arquette (@PattyArquette) February 13, 2019
H/T: The Vulture
