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Pubes: What Yours Say About You

A woman's lady-garden can be her pride and joy, but you never know what you're gonna find down there. Discover what your pubes say about you with the help of our trusty diagram...

The Full Bush

You're very likely to be either: A feminist, French or lazy. That's about it really.

Bikini Wax (A.K.A Landing Strip)

You're neat and rational. If it needs to be removed, it needs to go.

Nude

Either you're a woman who loves porn or you hate hairy people.

Martini

You're smart, but you also want to be organised and tidy without looking like a bald baby.

Bermuda Triangle

You're proud to keep your bush, but you also want to be able to get into a bikini without showing it off.

Heart Attack

You have far too much time on your hands. There's tending to your bush and then there's wasting time.

Postage Stamp

Hitler may be asking for his tache back. Otherwise, you've had an absolute mare with the razor/waxing utensils.

Vajazzle

If you're attracting boys to your vagina by telling them it's covered in glitter, you've got some serious daddy issues. Who wants to turn their beaver into a disco ball anyway?! More importantly, it would be fucking uncomfortable.


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A huge Ellen Degeneres fan, Luna enjoys any activity that begins with a drink and a smoke. Daydreaming, comfy armchairs and baby animals are her calling, while Saturday and Sunday take the top two spots as her favourite days of the week. In a few years time, she hopes to be self-sufficient on a desert island or running her own radio show.