Fucking money. It really does make the world go round, and you only realise this when you don't have any. Life is hard enough without being broke too. It makes it worse when you're the only who never has any cash, your friends always seem to be minted, and you have to count all your copper coins just to make up the bus fare. How the fuck do they do it? Being the broke one of the group is shit, and here's why:
1) The fear when you go to the ATM.
Who knows if there's actually any money in my little account to come out. What if there's not, HOW WILL I GET MY CARD BACK? Not that I need it.
2) Trying to think of a different excuse each time you have to cancel plans.
Because saying "I'm broke" just kills me a little bit inside every time I have to.
3) The anguish when the ATM runs out of twenties.
And they don't do tenners so basically I have to either forfeit lunch or take out fifty euro and weep.
4) Begging your parents for a loan of a fiver.
You feel like you're twelve again but you need some cash.
5) Making lunch to bring into college or work, just like school.
While everyone flaunts their O'Brien's sandwich under your nose, you sit and cry over your cheese and ham sandwiches from home.
6) McDonalds euro saver menu is your best friend.
Who can even afford to spend more than 2 euro?
7) Always being free.
Because you don't have a job, or money and all your friends are at work. Which makes you available alllll the time, providing the activity is cheap/free. Or you just want to come over and sit it my apartment with me.
8) Taking advantage of any Netflix And Chill offer to actually watch Netflix.
I need to catch up on some Suits, and he offered. Soz babes.
9) Applying for all the shitty jobs you can find because you're a broke ass bitch.
Once it pays, I'll apply. I'm not fussy.
10) Feeling the viscous burn of the circle of life when you're not hired.
They won't hire me because I don't have experience, but I can't get any experience BECAUSE no one will hire me. BITCHES that's not fair.
That shit is hard as fuck, but ya gotta do it in order to survive. It's a hard knock life and all that.
12) Having to pay for other people's shit when you all split the bill.
How in any way is splitting the bill fair? I don't want to pay for your main and desert when all I got was a piece of grass in a bowl. Not happening mate.
Never mind trying to decide what to get them, that's not an issue as you don't have a choice. You buy the cheapest thing you can find, obvs. And then proceed to feel guilty when you get you a really expensive present. Shit.
14) Taking as many free mints as you can when leaving a restaurant.
It's near impossible to pass that little bowl without filling your hand full of mints. Free study snacks waheyyyy.
15) Shopping for food is a nightmare because you have to make sure you get the cheapest shit.
Gotta make sure it's own brand stuff, need to save that 20cent.
16) Only visiting home when you've really run out of food.
You ate the last can of beans and now you're stuck. Cue you crawling back to your parents house to be fed.