Well, finally, it's all come down to this - your Junior Cert results day. Since the day you put down your pen for the final time in your last exam, you have been unable to think of anything else, you have been clammering for this moment. Sleep has become alien to you, all else in your life has fallen by the wayside as you became consumed by thoughts of this day, of finally, getting your results - or you've retained a healthy sense of perspective.
You will undoubtedly have been told numerous reasons over the course of the last year as to why you should care about the Junior Cert - it wielding an influence over your choice of Leaving Cert subejcts; pride in your own academic endeavour, or just simply because your parents pressured you to. However, all of that was but a mirage, a distraction from the true purpose of sitting your Junior Cert, a purpose which you may now fulfill today.
The true purpose of your Junior Cert was thus: so that you may claim a 1/4 free chicken from Nandos today during a special Junior Cert results themed promotional offer they're running. Acaedmic merit, any relevance to your educational future, surely pale in comparison to the promise of some free roasted fowl.
If you would like to avail of this, all you need to do as arrive in a Nando's wielding your Junior Cert results. Brandish them with abandon until your rightful demands for free chicken are met and your needs sated.
If a 1/4 of a chicken is not your bag, you may also choose one of the menu items from the firestarter menu. For the full list of T&C's click here.
They do however hilariously specify that, for someone to avail of this offer today, they may only show results from a 2019 Junior Cert. This implies that, at some point during a similar promotion in the past, some ingenious chicken-desirer dragged their historic Junior Cert results from whatever tattered old admin folder they had them secreted in, swanned up to a Nando's and demanded they be granted chicken.