Irish Humour

An Aussie Shares 20 Thoughts About Catching Dublin Buses

An Aussie Shares 20 Thoughts About Catching Dublin Buses

We've all caught a Dublin Bus but imagine being from Australia where buses are the worst form of transport, never on time, and you have to tap on AND off. New resident Emma shares her thoughts on catching the bus. Can you sympathise?

1. This Android top-up app is my life. Genius.

2. With that said, um is the Real Time Ireland app ever correct?

3. Getting on the bus is like being in a moshpit. Stop pushing me, little old lady!

4. OK it took me far too long to figure out that I should tell the bus driver how much I want to spend, instead of tapping on and paying the full €2.70. Like 5 weeks too long.

5. Actually why do I need to tell the bus driver how much I want to spend? Wouldn't it be so easy to lie? We tap off in Australia!

6. Now I need to find a seat. Hmmm, sit next to the girl applying makeup or the screaming child? I think I'll go upstairs...

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7. Walking up these stairs while the bus is moving is a serious death trap... do people sue for this sort of thing?

8. Got a seat yasss. OK please stop man-spreading, guy next to me. Your knees are taking up all the seat. And I'd appreciate if you didn't cough on me or open that window.

9. Is someone listening to a dance track on full volume with no headphones on? Oh wait they have headphones on. Oh wait that's someone else who also is playing music, but with a portable speaker.

10. Learning the street names in Gaelic is so fun. Shanowen Road - Boharr Nuh Shanowwww. Collins Avenue - Ascall Eeee Culloin! O'Connell Street - Shrod Eeee Con-ell!

11. I like that people don't try and talk to you on the bus, or stare.

12. People are wiping the windows to see out when it's foggy. Not sure if gross or good idea.

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13. Sometimes the bus driver says the bus stop instead of the lady... why dis?

14. Some guy just announced from downstairs that there's more seats upstairs. Not all heroes wear capes.

15. These traffic jams are the worst tbh. Dublin drivers are far too courteous! Not enough beeping imo.

16. Okay gotta get off the bus now, just gotta put past this child in the aisle, this man's leg, a big bag and a stray water bottle.

17. Holy shit, Jesus take the wheel Ima need help getting down these stairs. I'm shaking like a leaf. Someone catch me!

18. Okay I fell but made it look like I just wanted to take a seat on one of the steps. Farrrrk where did you get your bus driver licence? A cereal box? Brakes are not a joke.

19. Totally stopped way past the bus stop but it's k.

20. "Thank you" I say politely, despite being 20 minutes late for work.

Do you love/hate catching the bus? What are your thoughts?

Also read: The 18 Shit Struggles Everyone Who Gets The Bus Will Understand

Emma Greenbury
Article written by
Emma is an editor and writer from Brisbane, Australia and has been living in Dublin since September 2016 after she decided warm weather and beaches were overrated. She now wears three pairs of trousers every day and loves it.

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