College is the best time for "Mr Right Now." Realistically, we're gonna have a lot of them but sure we're young and stupid and need to experience it all while we have minimum responsibilities to worry about. So if you and your fella match the following signs, then he probably isn't around to stay. But keep him around for now - not everything has to be forever!
1. Your Gut Tells You
Sometimes it is really that simple. I once read that your gut feeling was "intuition and razor-sharp logic working in unison." So if you get a niggling feeling about him and just can't pinpoint why, it's because your super-intelligent subconscious can see something that you can't.
2. Your Friends Aren't Big Fans
Your mates know you better than you know yourself. And they're also the ones who can be as blunt AF and get away with it. Obviously your friends aren't gonna see the guy you're with in the same way that you do, but if they don't like him and can give valid reasons, maybe you should listen.
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3. He's Not Generous
And I don't just mean with money (although one of the biggest turn-offs is lads who are stingy.) Lack of generosity usually spills over into other areas such as being selfish in bed and also being selfish with his time. My advice to anyone currently seeing/in a relationship with a guy who is like this: Run. Run now.
4. He Isn't Thoughtful
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Like most things, this one works both ways. But if you constantly find yourself always being the one listening to him and his problems and yet when you speak up about yours, he just relates it back to himself, you should probably not be thinking about him in a long-term way. This sort of behaviour is shitty and not something people grow out of in a hurry.
5. You Haven't Had A Disagreement
"But that's a good sign!" you tell yourself. But note I said "disagreement" and not "explosive row." While the odd row is actually healthy, arguing constantly is exhausting. However, disagreements are totally normal and if you and himself just agree on everything, then it's just not going to last.
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6. You're Mad About Someone Else
This is kinda obvious. Being a naturally flirty person myself, I get that when you have a boyfriend you still have a little flirt here and there in total innocence. But when you're with someone and you have genuine feelings for someone else, it's probably a sign that your boyf isn't "Mr Right."
7. He Doesn't Listen
If you have a problem with something he did or does, you've openly talked about it and nothing's changed, then it's a bad sign. If he's not listening to you at the start of the relationship, then it doesn't look good for the long term unfortunately.
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8. He Doesn't Trust You
This should be a dealbreaker. Trust is the foundation for any relationship. If you don't have trust, you have nothing. So if he has no reason to distrust you and still does anyway, then it points to his own insecurities. People with low self-esteem find it hard to trust. That is their own issue and you can't help them with it. A person's own self-confidence has to come from within them and they need to love themselves before attempting to love anyone else.
9. You Spend More Of Your Time Feeling Shit Than Happy
To quote F Scott Fitzgerald, "If you're in love, it ought to make you happy. You ought to laugh." Simple as. If you're feeling shitty the majority of the time, it kinda says it all. Not only is he just "Mr Right Now" but he's probably a dickhead too.
