I've had moments where I've had a celebrity crush or a God-she's-beautiful moment on the street where I briefly questioned my sexuality thinking, "wait, does this mean I'm gay?" There are women (primarily Emma Watson) that I would definitely fuck. But whenever I've had my moments, I've told myself, no, you've always liked guys, you've always dated guys, you've only ever wanted to date guys, you like super frilly girly things and penetration. But maybe I never needed to give myself a firm answer.
I believe that sexuality exists on a spectrum. There aren't two or three options where you can be straight, bi, or gay and you have to check one of the three boxes on your birth certificate. You exist somewhere on a continuum of sexuality so maybe you've only ever thought of yourself as gay and that just means you're reallllly far over on the gay side of the spectrum and people who are near the middle might be bi but really they're closer to one side than the other. Basically what I'm saying is we shouldn't be expected to have firm answers because there aren't neat categories.
When you have that moment where you question your sexuality or maybe get too drunk and start thinking people of your own sex are looking realllly good, that's not necessarily because you're thinking crazy or you're piss drunk. It's because sexuality is a fluid thing.
I think we feel pressure to be able to give a one-word answer as to our sexuality and identification. We feel pressure to conform to one set category with pre-established societal rules. You have an idea of how a straight person behaves and how a gay person behaves, but you don't know how someone on the spectrum behaves or what they would say when asked how they identify.
But maybe the question of how we identify shouldn't be asked so often, and we shouldn't be expected to always abide by our preferences. It's normal to have feelings toward both genders, and there's no harm in acting on those attractions. After all, if we're not right on the dot at either end of the spectrum, we must all be bi.
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