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How To Date On The Cheap

"Weird" "Inappropriate" "Curiously Horrible" "Cheap" "Disturbing" "Cheap..."

All things I've been called in the past. Also, terms that people would use to describe their worst dates. So come on, you're doing it wrong. Here's how to plan a date that is cheap, but which doesn't seem cheap.

1. Talk Good.

If your banter is top notch, the rest should be immaterial. You could be sitting in a bus shelter drinking supermarket- brand beer and it wouldn't matter. Own it. Make it seem like this is exactly what the two of you should be doing right now, even if you had all the monies in the world. Keep a fluid conversation going. Bring interest to the table. Be interested: "You don't mind sharing Onion Rings in Burger King, right? So where were we? Oh yeah, sea- turtles..."

 

2. Museum Day.

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Hahaha you really thought I was gonna suggest you go to stuffy, smelly old museums? Like, FREE ones?! Well I am. They are places of actual merit. Where the accumulated knowledge and progressions of our predecessors throughout history are on display. A date where you can open your mind and maybe your legs (optional). Imagine the oh-so-rewarding post-sex chit chat: "Bla bla bla Vikings...Bla bla bla Things about the past... Bla bla bla I'm scared of dying alone... Bla bla bla" So chill.

 

3. Early- Bird Menus.

Meet straight after class in the city centre. Why? Because... we need the whole evening together... (not to get into 'Freddy's Italian Place' in time for the 3 Course For 2 Deal...Oh no...)

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4. Romantic Walk.

Just avoid Parks that charge entry... miserable gits...

5. Collect Vouchers For Things.

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Deals for cinema visits, restaurants, bars, clubs. Just requires fore-planning and all that (I know, "ZZZZ," right!?)


6. Netflix And Chill.

What in the name of Moses did our parents do before Netflix? Was it like, 'Carve funny stories into stone using smaller stones and then read them to each other- and chill?' Yuck. If your date agrees to this, and they are most definitely not chill, kick them out and go back to watching Deadliest Catch.

7. Cook Them A Meal.

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They don't need to know that all the ingredients are/will soon be out-of-date, and were bought on the cheap in that horrible discount aisle at the supermarket.

 

7. Frowned Upon Cheapness.

Organise a date in very fancy restaurant using someone else's minutes on their phone. Get dressed in your roommates nicer clothes. Go to date. Steal nice flowers out of a garden en route. Go into a pharmacy and spray yourself with nice stuff, but don't buy it. Meet date. Give them the stolen flowers. Go to fancy restaurant. Insist they order whatever they like. Finish. Tell them to head out, you'll catch up, you're just settling the bill. Don't settle the bill. Walk out two minutes after. Walk quite fast. *Will work if your date likes brisk walking over long distances.

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Video: 46 Cheap Date Ideas | FREE TO CHEAP WOO

 

 

Credit:  muchelleb

Stephen Brennan