It is a fact universally acknowledged that us young heterosexual women and homosexual men are drawn to the bad boy. Their supposed rebellious nature and danger is appealing and sexy and intoxicating, but we wouldn't want to date them forever. Bad boys are for sexy weekend flings and for fantasies, not long-term relationships. In relationship world you need a partner, not some flighty wild stallion who refuses to be tied down to one woman. What women want is someone to massage their ego, weather their emotions and be a good person. We don't want to be dicked around - literally and figuratively. Here are some traits of your typical good guy that women actually want:
1) Loyal
We want someone that's loyal to us and to their friends. Someone we can trust, who wouldn't betray us or our secrets. If there's no trust between the two of you, your relationship will just be full of paranoia. If neither of you can be comfortable with the other going out alone with their friends, that's a problem. Your life is your own, you should be able to live it without your boyfriend's shadow hanging over you, constantly checking up on you and judging you, but then heading out and cheating on you. We want someone who will have our back.
2) Listens
A guy who is willing and able to sit and listen to us moan about our days and maybe that bitch tutor who has it out for you or even our periods, is a guy that no girl would turn down cuddling for the night. A guy that takes in what we say and remembers it, that's the dream. He doesn't just listen, but maybe even helps or at least comforts. He lets you be yourself without judging you. He wouldn't blow you off or ignore you, because he actually cares.
3) Honest
He's open enough about his feelings so that you know where he stands - he might not be shouting it from the rooftops, but you know how he feels. Lying just leads to frustration, drama and fights. Especially if you know the guy is lying to you. Honesty is the best policy. Lies lead to having no trust, and if you can't trust them, what's even the point?
4) Humble
Proud but not in your face about it. Confident but not a complete self-obsessed gobshite. Confidence is great in a person, but you can be confident and not be a complete egotistical douchebag. Being proud of your achievements is cool, throwing them in everyone's face and acting like you're better than everyone else is not cool. At all.
5) Strong But Not Violent
He can take care of himself but doesn't abuse people. He won't throw around insults to hurt people to seem like a tough guy and he would never start a fight on a night out. He would also never, ever raise a hand to you and if he ever saw someone diss you or hurt you, he would stick up for you, not necessarily in a punchy way but maybe a dirty look thrown in that person's direction and a comforting cup of tea brewed for you.
6) Good With Money
He's not constantly hitting you up for a loan, or insisting you pay for everything. He has a job and likes being financially sound - or as financially sound you can be while you're in college. He isn't constantly broke and wouldn't splurge all his money on a whim gift for you that you would never want anyway.
7) Fun To Be Around
Not in an adrenaline-fuelled-mist-of-terror-induced-excitement, more like you genuinely aren't bored around them because they can be fun and happy and funny. They could be the quiet type but have a killer wit, or they could be the life and soul of the party, either way they're up for having fun and aren't brooding and moody and bringing the place down.
8) Open-Minded
Yeah, he might have opinions, but he doesn't force his down other peoples throats and allows others to have their own opinions too. He doesn't judge too easily, and generally goes by a code of live and let live. Plus, he likes going on adventures, even if those adventures are simply trying out a new restaurant, or possibly traveling abroad together.
9) Being Caring & Thoughtful
Actually pays attention to you and cares and you and people in general. Not so wrapped up in themselves that they only care about their desires and themselves. Not only will the good guy be there for you, he'll want to be there. It won't be a chore for him because he genuinely cares. He's respectful and will always make sure that you're comfortable with everything you're doing, sexually and otherwise.
10) Consistent
People need to accept that you can't change someone who doesn't want to change. Bad boys are never consistent, one minute they want you, the next they're all cold. It's not fun having our emotions toyed with. Women generally want someone who'll be there for them consistently.
11) Family Values
Regardless of whether he comes from a broken home or a steady background, he treats his Mother or sister with respect. Even if he doesn't get along with his parents he tolerates them and is polite. It just shows that he's willing to be the bigger person and maintain composure and his temper even during stressful family times, like Christmas.
