Every relationship has their milestones: first kiss, first "I love you," first shared key, and eventually, first apartment. But, people don't really recognize the other milestones that happen when you date someone long-term. You start noticing his razor resting on the stand in your shower, or how he keeps an extra phone charger plugged in on your nightstand. Here are some other things that suddenly appear when you're in a long-term relationship:
1. Random Boxers Appear Out Of Nowhere.
Seeing his boxers under your bed makes sense. But, then, you jump on the couch for a quick snooze and you realize there are boxers in between the cushions...excuse me? Did you get uncomfortable while watching T.V. and thought you'd relax a bit?? Or wait...did we have sex here? Wait, yes we did, last week. Oh, hold up no, no, it wasn't this couch, I think we had sex on the other couch. But, how did his boxers get over here? God, everything blends together.
2. Frequent Texts From His Mom.
You know what they say; you start dating someone and you date their family. You actually look forward to his mom's "Good Morning!!!" texts, update her on your work woes, vent when your S.O. just doesn't seem to know how to clean up his shit, and let her in on all your happy news. Your boyfriend can't tell if he loves that you guys get along so well or if he's annoyed that she takes up time you guys could be spending together.
3. Multiple Toothbrushes.
When you think about it, you never really looked at your toothbrush. That's your own fault, because now you're staring at two toothbrushes next to your sink and you can't for the life of you remember which one is yours. Red? Blue? I don't even like the color red so that one probably isn't mine...right? Is it weird to share? Ok, fine, that's totally gross. Jesus, I need to write our names on them.
4. A Designated Drawer.
I mean, this is just a rite of passage in every long-term relationship: the personal drawer. It's like an unspoken sign of love, that you let me fill up a drawer in your room with tampons and underwear. Thank you for taking our relationship seriously.
5. His Favourite Snacks Are Stocked In Your Fridge
You open your fridge and start to see food that you definitely didn't buy. Packs of cheap beer? Ready Salted Crisps? Is he alright like? If you're gonna start taking over my fridge throw in a few jumbo bars of Galaxy and a bottle or two of wine please and thank you.
6. His Socks. E V E R Y W H E R E.
How can one person own so many pairs of stupid smelly black socks...AND THEN SCATTER THEM EVERYWHERE? Everywhere you step is like a fucking land mine and if he even thinks for a second that you're gonna wash them he can fuck right off.
7. ...Your Socks E V E R Y W H E R E.
Okay...you know you're not innocent either. But seriously, socks are always missing and seem to show up in the most random places. It's not my fault your floor seems to be a magnetic strip for my socks. And in fairness, at least yours don't smell as rank.
8. His Clothes...On You
When you look in the mirror and realise that not one piece of clothing, from your jeans to your hoodie, is actually yours, you know for sure that you're practically married. And that you look ridiculous in baggy jeans and old Metallica jumper.
9. His Mates On Your Couch
Suddenly there's loud beardy people with cans of cheap beer watching "the match" in your apartment and you can't even get with any of them. Not that you'd want to excuse you, you've very happily loved up. His mate Dave The Ride doesn't count though, right?
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