So you've decided to try and act like someone in their early twenties who has their life together and no longer smokes. No more hanging around on freezing patios at parties puffing away on cigs for you! The world is basically your oyster, regardless of how many stairs you have to walk up. But before you get to that, there are a few steps that every smoker has to go through.
1. The Motivation
"You know what? This is it. This is my last cigarette ever!" Is usually how it goes. You feel this well of motivation inside you. You can do anything! So smoking isn't gonna stand in your way. You don't want to be that person stinking of wet cigarrete dog on entering a room, the stench of defeat- an odour that brings out almost sympathy from others.
2. Instant craving
Well maybe one more little cigarette won't hurt before I quit forever. Just to get rid of the last of my cravings. Or maybe I should just finish the pack. I did spend all that money on it... I'm gona have these with some wine- Fuck, I deserve to enjoy my last few ok?!
You've managed to ignore your cravings and now you know that it's possible to ignore them! You are a strong person with iron will, vile tobacco can't tell you what to do. You're gonna have the most glowing skin, the whitest teeth and the healthiest lungs. When everyone else is 50 you are gona look a mere 30 you clever, wise thing you. This is brilliant and everything is beautiful in the world.
4. Six Hours In
Oh fuckkkkk, maybe your will isn't strong as iron. Maaybe this will be a little bit harder than you thought. The shop is only like, 2 minutes away and you know you could be smoking in the next ten minutes but hey, you've gone this far so why give in now?
Because you've just realised that somewhere in the past few years of social smoking, that you, my friend, have become wildly addicted.
5. Anything To Distract Yourself
Keeping your hands busy is extremely important. And that can mean anything...Do anything to keep yourself moving so your brain doesn't focus on the cravings. Clean your room, work out (yeah, right) or go for a walk...you know as long is it's the other direction from a place that sells cigarettes.
6. Trying To Sleep
Okay so you are probably gonna have a shitty nights sleep. Your bed will feel lumpy, your whole body uncomfortable and frustrated, you'll be seriously warm but this is all part of it. The first 24 hours are the hardest because that's when you feel the least guilt about quitting. Just stick it out, do what you need to feel a little more comfortable and you'll be asleep in no time.
7. The Night Out.
This is the real test. All your friends are heading out and so are you. The more drunk you get the more you'll want a cigarette, especially if you and your friends are the type to spend the night in the smoking area. You're so used to having a drink in one hand and a smoke in the other. They are a beautiful union. Even if you manage to avoid it you know it'll always be there- BUT overcome this and you can overcome anything. Literally, any fucking thing.
You woke up with a hangover but for once you don't have a wheezy chest. You don't feel that phleghm at the base of your throat lurking and haunting you giving you guilt. You managed to go the whole night without a cigarette. That is huge. You deserve a serious pat on the back, you know, once you are sure you aren't gonna puke.
9. The Change
Now you start to notice that you feel a little better, you aren't as frustrated as you used to be and you can manage stress a little better now. Not to mention all those sweet dolla bills you got left over. Basically, you're all the better for chucking that pack of fags in the bin.
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