Anyone who says "drunk words are sober thoughts" must not drink that much. Actually, it's more like "drunk words are the warped garbling of an intoxicated individual."
These are the things that only happen on a drunken night out...
1. A couple have a massive argument over absolutely nothing
2. Someone gets refused entry because they’re a liiiitttlle bit too pissed
3. Someone throws up somewhere they really shouldn’t
4. Someone gets their drink taken off them and isn’t very happy about it
5. Someone gets off with someone and instantly regrets it
6. Someone refuses to leave the club when it closes
7. Someone’s dancing gets a little too ‘funky’ for everyone
8. Then that someone narrowly avoids starting a fight
9. Someone loses their phone/purse/coat
10. Someone spends the night wandering around looking for everyone else
11. Someone will get very annoyed that the DJ didn’t play their request
12. Drinks will be spilled all over someone
Yourself, if you're unlucky.