DON'T EVER PLAY YOURSELF. Ok? You tired. You've had a shit day in college. You need inspiration quick. You need to tune into the hustle. You need DJ Khaled in your life. But you ain't have time to google his best snaps/advice. Well fear not. I've done it for you.
SO HERE IT IS Y'ALL. The Key To Success.
Life advice with Khally... Lets do this...
1. ANOTHER ONE.
Like "Rosebud." Or the Briefcase in Pulp Fiction. Or even what that grandparent with dementia says when they visit. Its not about the actual words. It's about what they mean... I think. I dunno I'm stressed, I need a shower with Dove soap (gahhh, curse you Khally!)
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2. MULTIPLE PILLOWS ARE KEY.
Many things can be 'key.' But this one sounds comfortable. You need to know what is and isn't 'key', or you won't get on the pathway to bigger success.
3. DON'T PLAY YOURSELF.
If you play yourself, then you the game. You don't wanna be the game. You want to be a player of the game. In fact you want to be THE player. You feel me?
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4. WHEN YOU GET OUT THE SHOWER DRY YOUR BACK. IT'S A COLD WORLD OUT THERE.
Have you got a wet back right now? Yes? Then go home and dry your back. You will catch a metaphorical and actual chill.
5. COCOA BUTTER
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You gotta stay smooth and mildly fragranced.
6. KEEP YOUR HEAD ABOVE THE WATER.
Especially in Jacuzzi's... I mean, chlorine getting into your eyes, bubbles tickling your cheeks, it's not ideal.
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7. SOME CAN'T HANDLE SUCCESS... I CAN.
When you get into this frame of mind, you will feel successful guys.
8. AINT NUTHIN' LIKE BAMBOO... BLESS UP.
The environment and stuff. Important. KEY.
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9. KEEP YO' FACE CLEAN.
Otherwise, that shit gon' be dirty.
10. IT'S IMPORTANT TO WATER YOUR PLANTS, EVERYDAY.
KEY to keeping your plants alive. (A hammock don't hurt either).
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11. THEY DON' WANT YOU TO HAVE LUNCH... BUT YOU GON' HAVE LUNCH.
You literally need to eat, but its nice to feel extra justified about the act of eating food at lunch time.
12. NEVER COMPLAIN... COMPLAIN IS A WEAK EMOTION.
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You know it's true. Stop feeling so goddamn 'complain' all the time.
13. LIFE IS LIKE A ELEVATOR. UP DOWN, UP DOWN. STAY FOCUSED.
If you don't, you just might miss your floor, if you know what I mean...
