Shit Relationship Advice That You Shouldn't Listen To

It’s been 6 months, get over it. Move on.

I'll take as much time as I want thank you very much Mr. Rulemaker

You should lose weight if you’re hoping to find a new relationship

Screw you you shallow pr*ck, I'm all wo/man

You can do better than her/him


Perhaps, but do you know the intricacies of our relationship or are you just commenting without the correct know how

You should or shouldn’t settle down by the age of X.

I shall settle down when I bloody well choose or not choose to.

All of your friends are getting married, and you're single and constantly up skilling yourself, you’re never going to find someone to give me my big day out.


Thanks mum

Taking someone’s last name is one of the most important parts of getting married.

Oh is it now....How about I, a man, take a woman's name eh? Would that be OK? Why can't we both keep our own names. Why does she always have to take my name?

If you don’t make finding a relationship your priority, you’re going to end up alone.


Oh big swing...I have all these cats and pigeons that are more than willing to keep me company

Online dating is for people who can’t find real relationships, don’t use it.

Yes it's for fictional people that meet online in a fictional world....Welcome to the 21st century you dinosaur

A job is not going to hold you while you’re falling asleep at night....


No but my money and all these skills I've obtained will

Everyone needs to have at least one one-night stand..

Yes I actually agree with this one

All men are pigs


Not really bad relationship advice per say, but often the answer given to a lot of break ups by friends etc...Heard more often than you'd think. But for the record...all pigs are pigs, all men guessed it....MEN

You've been together years, you have to get married!

No, it means that you don't see bowing to society's "how to live your life book" as a very important thing in your life, It's easy to be happy without being married, people in a hurry to get married are just that way because they watched too many Disney princesses when they were younger...hell, maybe you have no interest in getting married.

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Ian Smith
Article written by
Ian is a contributing writer for CollegeTimes. He is currently partying his ass off for the Summer having spent the past 7 years at various colleges across the globe. While by no means an athlete, he considers himself a world class darts player... If you tweet him he will not respond.

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