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10 Things Your Mother Will Definitely Say During The Snow

10 Things Your Mother Will Definitely Say During The Snow

We're all housebound for the next couple of days which means we're going to reach peak cabin fever, with guaranteed rows between the whole family.

Who needs to listen to any weather forecasters when you've got mammy at home. She'll have all the know-how to see us through this cold spell. Here are just a few gems you're guaranteed to hear.

''It's too cold to snow''

Well this theory, which seems to have existed in Ireland since the dawn of time, has evidently been proved wrong. Look at the snow now, Mammy!

''Go easy on the milk''

There may be ten litres in the house but who knows when we'll ever get out to shop again? No cereal until the coast is clear.

''Now don't be setting foot outside the door''

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You'll catch your death if you even stick your nose out. Don't be coming back in crying to mammy when you've gotten the flu.

''Your father is after going to...''

Regardless of the warnings she gives the house your father will inevitably venture out for some reason and will cause your mother to have a canary.

"Shut that door, you're either in or out"

It's bad enough to go outside but to then stand in the doorway letting all the heat out, that's just not on. And it's not just the front door, the doors in between rooms are the same. You'll create a draught.

''Take that jacket off while you're inside, you won't feel the benefit of it when you go out''

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This is a favourite no matter what the time of year. If you wear one coat inside then you'll have to wear a second coat once your out.

"I might chance putting out the clothes for an hour in between blizzards"

Snow or no snow, there's washing to be done.

"I hope we don't run out of coal"

If you're running off solid fuel then the next few days will be a procession of constant arguments about a) who's going out for the coal and b) rows about using too much of the coal.

"I might make soup"

There is no weather so cold whereby it can't be fought off with a good bowl of soup. Sure it's warm the cockles of your heart.

"I'll put on your electric blanket"

You didn't even realise you had an electric blanket but don't worry, mammy has one for you and she's turned it up to eleven.

Mark Farrelly

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