Graduating from college is a great achievement. Whatever it was that you studied aside, you should always be proud of getting that piece of paper and yes, that does include a degree in Philosophy. So while it's always something to look forward to, the mere thoughts of having to stand on a stage in front of hundreds of people are bound to bring a few nerves to the forefront. Here are some genuine fears you'll have in the lead up to your graduation. Best of luck and congrats!
1) Falling Over
You're likely to have many cold sweat inducing nightmares in the lead up to your Graduation, with this thought solely responsible for over half of them. We've all heard the stories, watched the videos, thought the thoughts. You're probably going to sit there for most of it, awaiting your turn and watching woman after woman seemingly achieve the impossible and remain upright in their seven-inch heels. Why they take that risk is something that nobody will ever understand.
2) Resembling Harry Potter
I'm a wizard, Harry. Well, I at least resemble a wizard, wearing this rather fantastic looking cloak in order to prove my intelligence. Makes perfect sense when you think about it...
3) Being Called The Wrong Name
Considering the fact that you're lined up in mass numbers and have to wait awkwardly at the side of the stage for your name to be called, there's a tiny chance that you'll be called up by the wrong name. What do you do? Where can you run to? What if you fall while running away?
4) Your Hat Falling Off
Those damn hats aren't as snug as you might think. In fact, it's quite similar to balancing a book on top of your head, whilst also concentrating on not tripping over. They'll give you a few hair clips to keep it in place, but that's similar to anchoring a boat with a shoelace. Hold on for dear life is my advice.
5) Picking A Shit Outfit
Everyone turns up rocking their finest gear for a graduation, so naturally, there's always that fear that you'll be underdressed and will look like a massive tit. Nothing too shiny, casual, short, long or slutty should just about have you covered.
6) Taking An Ugly Picture With The President
Up onto the stage, you'll have to pop and when you're receiving that oh so important piece of paper from the main man himself, just remember that you're going to have your picture taken in front of hundreds of spectators, no pressure, emulate a model and say cheese.
7) Turning Up To The Wrong Ceremony
I must have checked my own ceremony details ninety times, minimum. The fear of turning up to a medical ceremony was all that stood between me and death from mortification. How long could I sit through medicine related jokes and continue to look intelligent? Not too long, I'd say.
8) The Painfully Long Ceremony Itself
This isn't so much a fear as it is a harsh, boring reality. There's no getting around it, that shit takes hours. Some Universities even conduct the whole thing in Latin. Yes, you did read that correctly, Latin. Then there's the guest speaker that generally has nothing in common with the course graduating that day. For our Journalism graduation, for example, we had someone from Ryanair. I'm still trying to figure out why...
9) Feeling Like You Worked Your Arse Off For Nothing
Yes, getting dressed up and flouncing about in gowns is a great way of celebrating many late nights and used Biro's, but you're probably going to have a small sense of 'is this it?', about the whole thing. Don't worry, we all feel the same.
10) Finding Out Your Entire Class Are Already Employed
So what have you been up to in the three months since we left full-time education? Oh you know, a few job applications, a lot of sleep and a hell of a lot of drinking. What about you? Oh, you're employed now? Great. Tarnishing my dreams in one fell swoop.
11) That You'll End Up 'Romanticising' A Classmate
At the end of it all, you've spent day in, day out with these people for at least a year, possibly four years. There's never really been anything there, but add relief, joy, and alcohol into the equation and you have yourself a recipe for disaster and awkwardness and undoing years of friendship and bonding. Oh no....