Waking up after a fun-filled weekend and realising that you have 5 full working days ahead until you're temporarily free again is a horrible feeling. Got a case of the Monday blues? Here are 11 horrible things that happen on a Monday.
11. You have no music on your journey to work.
Your ipod is out of battery because you forgot to charge it the night before or the internet data on your phone is used up which means you have a boring, silent journey to work this Monday morning.
10. The hookup you had at the weekend texts you at 8am asking when they can see you again.
This is the last person you want to hear from at the beginning of your week. What you thought was a casual one-night hookup looks like it's turning into a stage 5 clinger.
9. You eat your leftover Burger King from the night before for breakfast.
You went to bed late on Sunday night after trying to recuperate from your weekend hangover. You didn't buy anything for breakfast as you were too busy stewing in your own filth and now you're paying the price. The only thing mildly edible in your house is half of a double bacon cheeseburger from the previous day. Oh well...
8. You have nothing to wear.
You're forced to wear creased and unwashed clothes as you did not do any washing, drying or ironing at the weekend. Who does, right? Well you definitely regret it now. You try get away with wearing a sweat soaked shirt by dousing it in Lynx Africa deoderant. It doesn't work, and everyone at work will tell you so...
7. You spill coffee all over your clothes.
Rushing out the door with your bacon double cheeseburger in one hand, and an instant cup of coffee in the other, you didn't put the lid on properly, and when you go to take a sip, coffee floods from the underside of the lid and drenches your clothes. And what's worse, you were wearing a white shirt today...
6. You're hungover to shit.
The 2 nights drinking you participated in are having a rough knock-on effect and a delayed Monday hangover hits you like a sledgehammer to the face. Even worse if you decided to "go for the cure" with a few Sunday drinks the day before.
5. You have to wait at least 2 more days til the new episode of your favourite TV show.
No good TV show airs on a Monday. You've got to wait until at least Wednesday for good TV. The only thing you have to look forward to on TV when you get home from work is re-runs of Friends for the 1000th time or a new episode of The Simpsons, but Matt Groening has milked it far too long and the new series are absolute poo.
4. You sleep it out.
Of course you do. It's Monday morning and you have to rid yourself of your weekend habits and get yourself back to neutral. However you drop the clutch a few times and it takes you longer than expected. Okay, that metaphor got away from me but you get the idea. It's 8:30am and you were meant to leave the house half an hour ago. Late again.
3. You just started your diet. Again.
Always on a Monday. Let's see how long you last this time. Your friends and coworkers probably have pools on how long it takes you this week to crack ... "Who had Thursday??!"
2. You didn't have time to make your lunch.
You had no time to prepare lunch because you were too lazy the night before and you slept it out this morning. You grab a collection of the most random and mismatched items of food in your kitchen and head for the door. Tuc crackers, half a kiwi and an expired packet of Dairylea Lunchables with something green and fuzzy growing on the cheese slices.
1. You're already counting down the hours til work is over and you haven't left the house yet.
You're already thinking about the end of the work day and looking forward to the weekend. You've got a case of the Monday blues!