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The 18 Types Of People You Meet At Every Wedding

Weddings are meant to be this magical day where a man and a woman form and eternal bond. Then you have to actually invite people to the wedding, that's where things start to unravel. You don't have control over them and you just hope they don't do something to ruin the day. Here are the 18 types of people you meet at every wedding.

18) The drunk uncle who thinks he can dance

We all have that uncle that really comes alive at weddings. Always the first one up on the dancefloor after the bride and groom, give him a few pints and he thinks that he is Michael Flatley.

17) The desperate bride's maid

She was the last bride's maid to be chosen and was only picked to round out the numbers. She's is desperately single, so a wedding is her perfect chance to find Mr. Right. More than likely she will end up being the one who sneaks off with a guy when everyone is having desert.

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16) The hot third cousin that you've never met before

You get introduced to her and  you wonder where she crawled out of. You're not directly related to her so if you happen to hook up you won't feel ashamed. There will always be a cloud hanging over you though, because technically she is your cousin.

15) The food critic

They come to a wedding and expect the cuisine to be of the highest standard. Everyone knows you get beef or salmon and that's about it. They go to a lot of weddings so they are constantly comparing the food from different weddings and of course they have to secretly tell everyone know how bad the wedding cake is.

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14) The "freelance" photographer

Even though the bride and groom actually paid for a proper photographer, there is always that one person who thinks they're a wedding photographer. They will always be in the background shadowing the actual photographer and saying things like "Alright, now say cheese" and "come on give us a smile".

13) The one that just wants to say a few words

When everyone is doing their toast there is always that one person who wants to say a few words. They are usually are a friend of a friend and end up talking for a half and hour about great the couple is . It starts out innocent enough, but then gets real awkward, when they start talking about how they just want to be happy like the bride and groom.

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12) The nosey aunt

She is always asking how your love life is and whether or not you are in a relationship. You don't mind indulging her at first, but after while when she starts talking to you about her sex life you completely zone out.

11) The raunchy grandmother

She hasn't been out in years and I mean years, so when she gets a little drink she rekindles her youth. She has really awkward conversations with you, she gives every detail about all the guys she was with back in the day. Then she has to bring her and her husband...... uhhhh old people sex.

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10) The life coach

They tell everyone about all the countries they have been to and how you have to go there. They're on a career break so there still "finding" themselves. They are also vegetarian and scoff at everyone else eating their meal and tell them how unhealthy it all is.

9) The one that got married last year

She has been through it before, so she knows the drill. Unfortunately, this gives her a huge sense of entitlement and she explains how everything should be done. Then of course everyone's sentence begins with "Well, at my wedding".

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8) The wedding singer

They're not actually the wedding singer, but when the night is winding down, they go up on stage and dedicate a song to the bride and groom. They end up completely butchering "I don't want to miss a thing" by Aerosmith, no one quite has the guts to tell him to get off the stage.

 7) The sobbing mother

It all gets a bit too much for the mother of the bride and the day really gets to her. You would swear you were at a funeral, because she is crying so much. It's bad enough in the church, but when everyone makes their speeches the waterworks really go off.

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6) The hungover bar man

Hotel and catering staff are always friendly and always have a smile on their face. There is always that one poor soul, that was out last night and looks like death. You crack a joke while you're waiting for your drink and he is in no mood to laugh. Anytime he goes around to collect people's glassed he looks like he's about to get sick.

5) The "comedian"

This the loud and obnoxious at your table that tries to make everyone laugh. At first he's kind of funny, but by the time the speeches come around you need a smoke. If you this guy happens to be you're best man I feel sorry you, he is going to be incredibly drunk and his jokes are going to bomb.

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4) The creepy cousin

There is always that black sheep in every family that creeps everyone out. They were always a bit odd, but know that they're older they are even weirder. You just try to stay clear of them  as much as you can, but your parents inevitably end up introducing you to them.

3) The person that no one invited

No one has a clue who they are and where they came from. They make up some long winded answer about how they know the groom. We all know the real reason,  free beer and to pick up girls, both of which they won't end up getting.

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2) The father of the bride, who ends up falling asleep

After a lot  of drinking and dancing,  the father of the bride usually ends up taking a cheeky nap on the chair. They usually do it quite discreetly, when no one is watching. It's embarrassing though when they fall asleep in the church.

1) The nervous best man

Everything is riding on his speech, if it doesn't go down well you will have ruined the whole wedding. You have been planning for months and months to get the speech just right. If the speech bombs you will most likely no longer be friends and will have left a stain on their wedding day, no pressure.

Kenneth Fox
Article written by
I'm a musician and a writer, or a writer and a musician, I can't make up my mind, Either way I'm not particularly good at either. A bit of an old fashioned guy, who enjoys the simpler things in life, nothing fancy.

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