Don't worry girls, we all tell them to ourselves on a daily basis. You are not alone.
1) I'll go to bed early tonight
No, you won't. And you knew that almost immediately after you made this decision, it was not going to happen. Go on, stick on another episode of 90210... One more won't hurt.
2) I'll start going to the gym every day
Hormones are probably to blame for this one; "I feel so bloated", "I've definitely put on weight..." It was never going to happen. Next week, you'll be over it, and you'll feel as fabulous as ever.
3) I'm not gonna get drunk tonight
Ladies, more often than not, this is tempting fate. You will have too many tequilas, you will slut drop till your legs ache, and you will feel like ass the next day. It's true.
4) I'm not getting with HIM again
Really? Don't be surprised when point number 3) impairs your judgement and you end up kissing that guy you promised yourself you wouldn't. Sure what harm? It's not like you've made an agreement to marry him or anything...
5) I'm giving up junk food
So it's Thursday morning and you're hungover... Or you're on your period. You're really not going to give in to those super bad cravings. Go on, you deserve it, firstly; for how much drink you put away last night, you need that soakage! And secondly; for being a woman and dealing with all the things we go through that men simply don't.
6) I'm staying in this week.
€2.50 shots? I am there!
7) Sure I don't even like him, it's only a bitta fun.
This one is okay for the first few weeks/months, but eventually it's yourself you're going to be convincing, not your mates.
8) I'm gonna start studying, like, really soon.
Easier said than done, but sure God loves a trier!