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Massive Snake Washes Up On Beach In Cork

Massive Snake Washes Up On Beach In Cork

There's nothing to quite make you feel like you're living in the end times than a good ol' fashioned plague. Can't go wrong with them. God knew it. Sure as clockwork, if ever any group of people were running up against it, he'd shoot of an influx of animals their way to let them know their time was up. Back then when God was at his peak, you knew, sure as sure could be, that if you looked to the horizon and saw a vast swarm of, occasionally incongruous animals, headed your way that it meant bad news.

You looked out your window and saw a plague of locusts? You knew it was the end times. You opened up the door to your stable to see your stable full to the brim with badgers? End times. Open your coin purse only for a flood of properly livid beetles to flow out? You better have believed that some end times were coming your way.

Well, I feel that it is this, and no other, conclusion that be drawn from the fact there has been a large snake discovered on a beach in Cork.

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The Coast Guard said they were called out after the snake - which may also just be a very long emaciated zebra, though this may be just idle speculation based on its colour scheme - was discovered washed up on a beach. The snake apparently measures 1.5m, with the coast guard speculating that it is either a Turtle headed sea snake or a California king snake. If the latter, its presence in Youghal merits serious questioning and we can only presume it to be deeply unwell for swapping the sunny climes of California for Youghal in January.

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Rory McNab

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