A professor in the University of Michigan was livid. He was absolutely fuming. "About what?" you may cry, "give us the sweet succour of context," well, about the fact that the vast majority of his students were not paying the slightest bit of attention during his lectures.
He felt that, for many of his students, his wizened teachings were simply providing some gentle background ambience for their internet shopping. As such, he decided to put up a slide showing what the class had been occupying themselves with instead of paying their undivided attention to his "EARTH 222/ENVIRON 232".
The slide, titled "Things I Noticed EARTH 222/ENVIRON 232 Students Doing During Class", showed a list of the classes Google searches, with 'x's beside the most common ones. The most popular ones were unsurprising, Facebook, Amazon etc. However, it goes off the beaten track after this, and it goes off it hard.
Some of the gems include "Drawing a tree? A squid?", "Photoshopping President Trump onto muppets" and, what might be single greatest Google of all time, "Buying $240 worth of turtlenecks". Let's just savour this for a moment. This fashionista with a chilly neck, this brave maverick, not content with simply buying one turtleneck, nor indeed any specific number of turtlenecks, no, they are merely looking to get as many turtlenecks as is possible for $240 dollars. Their budget is so beautiful, so specific. Being a student, they are presumably not rolling in disposable income, yet they have set scrimped and saved their $240 dollars to invest in turtlenecks.
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Let's just pray that this does not universally take off for every university professor.
