Why People Who Order Complicated Coffees Are The Real A**holes

You know who I 'm talking about. Those people who have extremely complicated coffee orders. They may argue with the Barista or simply take so long to order. One thing is for sure these people are highly irritating. As I was a barista for a few years of my life I have decided I do not like these people. So, here we have it, Why People Who Order Complicated Coffees Are The Real A**holes.

1) The Long Order

Firstly people with confusing coffee orders come across as pretentious. No one likes pretentious people, even pretentious people will agree with that. Their long and wordy order makes them seem like they think they are better than the rest. They would like "A grande caffe mocha, no sugar, no whipped cream, extra dry, with half skim, half full milk. No I don't want 2% milk, just a mixture of the two. And raspberry syrup, mixed with the milk, then the coffee."

2) Coffee Shapes

Some of these coffee lovers go as far as requesting a shape in the coffee. Come on, do we really have nothing better to do?


3) Rude Remarks

They know so much about coffee that they may question the system. If they don't recognize their local barista they may think they don't know their stuff.

4) Health Kick Professionals

"Is the coffee Gluten free?" "Half sugar?" "Hemp milk?"


5) Confrontation

"What do you mean you are out of soy milk?? And Vanilla Syrup? Jesus what is this place?"

6) Long Decisions

These orderers can work in two ways. They will either be in a rush and order obnoxiously fast. Or, take the whole day umm-ing and aahh-ing about what to get.


7) The Territorial

Some of these coffee fiends are very territorial. If anyone touches their coffee or takes it by mistake they will get you.

8) The Questioning

"Hmmm, what food do you have? Is that nice? Would that go well with my Venti 7 pump vanilla, extra-hot, non-fat, caramel swirl on top and bottom, no-whip cream coffee?."

9) The Depressing Order

Some of these annoying coffee orderers need time to vent. They are having a bad day and they will treat their barista like their shrink and there is nothing that will stop them.

Lauren Rol
Article written by
Lauren Rol: A UCD graduate who spends most of her time watching the Soaps. A devout fan of Chinese food and a French Bulldog obsessive.

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