Ugh, Ireland. It's the worst country in the world! The people are terrible, the scenery is shite and the drinks are crap. It's seriously the worst and I'm here today to tell you why Ireland sucks. Sorry, not sorry.
1. The people are shit craic
— Jess Glynn (@ItsJessGlynn) April 11, 2017
This isn't funny. At all. Nope.
2. The President is dull
— ALF 🌻 (@_bmaaack) February 5, 2017
Just look at him on a bike. Snore.
3. The Cliffs of Moher are a snooze fest
4. Guinness tastes awful in Ireland
Just look at how unpalatable these are. I bet no one drinks them here.
5. The beaches are ugly
6. Tayto chip sandwiches are disgusting
— Celtic Canada (@CelticCanada) April 8, 2017
It just tastes bad. I mean, who could like chips on bread?
7. Either are chicken fillet rolls
— Lenehan (@lenehan5202) March 13, 2017
Mayo and butter on a roll? Sick.
8. Croke Park could be better on game day
— Spoura Sports (@spouraspor) February 17, 2017
Looks like no one was there.
9. The green grass makes me sick
Ugh, looks dead to me.
10. The skyline is shit
Wouldn't put this pic on Insta. Nope. Straight to trash.
11. Drinking in a fake Irish pub is better than a real one
Pubs in Ireland are too loud and fun.
12. Father Ted isn't funny at all
Nope. Didn't even laugh. This show is terrible clearly.
13. Country people are boring
Nothing to see here. So bored.
14. St Patrick's Day is an uncolourful day
— GCullen Photography (@gcullenphoto) March 21, 2017
No one ever does anything on Paddy's Day in Ireland. Snoozefest.
In all seriousness, I feckin' love you, Ireland! I was only kidding.