The Top 34 Names Of Crazy People

What's in a name you might ask, well actually quite a lot. A lot of research and interviewing and charts and graphs and stuff went into this list. Read it and be all the wiser:


Alan - sleeps with girls and never calls after, ever. 

Michael - has been known to steal things from girls' houses and give out a fake number. 

Sean - extremely scabby. Asks girls to split on the first date always even if you're on the dole. 

Joe - Uses too many emojis in texts and very flaky. 

Will - weighs less than most girls and gives them a complex about their bodies as a result. 


James- Gets aggressive after more than 4 pints. 

Robert- Mean to animals and was once known to throw a pillow at Sophie's cat. 

Shane - takes up the whole bed.

Cathal - makes weird noises when he comes. 

Richard - Lies about his age and smokes too much weed. 

Kevin - Stole a silver fork from Michelle's house and won't give it back even though it's an heirloom. 


Rory - Gets too drunk at parties and needs to be taken care of. 

Tony - Has an ego far too large for his tiny little body.

Paul -Poor hygiene and rarely changes his boxers. 

David - Freaks out once he meets your parents and dumps you immediately without reason. 

Denis - Has a 5 date rule and wants his girlfriend to go to mass (even though he doesn't go himself).

Alex - Eats all the food in your house and never replaces it. 



Rachel- Can’t drink for shit, regularly ends up asleep in the toilets.

Sinead- Known to be a bit too fond of the shifting and drifting.

Sarah- Once headbutted a wall in mistake of her boyfriend.

Aishling- Likes to sneak naggins into clubs in her knickers for the thrill.

Amy- Once passed out mid sex resulting in mass panic from her partner.


Tara-Regularly kicked out of nightclubs for reasons she just can't remember.

Louise- A right divil for a good mass, will happily go seven days a week.

Joanne- Once woke up with a bruised hand after attacking someone who stole her vodka.

Gillian- Hasn’t been spooned by anyone that isn’t her dog in three years.

Mairead-Once convinced Bae to use a sandwich bag in subsitute for something safer...

Fiona- Regularly puts out in the back of her boyfriend's Transit after a few too many WKDS.


Claire- Cries when her boyfriend of three weeks hasn’t text back within 17 minutes.

Laura- Has accidentally been involved in a foursome but she doesn’t quite know how.

Niamh- Wins men's affections by insulting them so much they become visibly upset and need to be comforted.

Denise- Always borrows money you don’t have, never has credit, always scabs lifts but is still the best dressed usually in your clothes that she cakes in her mouldy fake tan.

Katie- Was born to be a Mammy. Will feed you her home baked shite every breathing minute whilst filling you with motherly advice on life.

Kellie- Makes you feel so much better about your life as hers is in a desperate state. If she isn’t dating an outpatient, then she's running from the debt collectors.

CollegeTimes Staff
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