When you’re feeling like the world is out to get you, like the universe is definitely not on your side and like you’re never going to be happy again, it doesn’t matter how many people say to you ‘things will get better’ or ‘it could always be worse’, you’re still going to feel like sh1t.
Sometimes, it gets so bad that you say ‘fuck positive mental attitude, it’s doing nothing for me, I might as well bask in my misery’, but unfortunately, while it's the road of least resistance, it's not the way to go. Deciding to give up on positive thinking because nothing good is happening in your life is like deciding to eat unhealthily for the rest of your life because your diet hasn’t shown results after 2 days. It’s a process, and your mind is like your body, it needs conditioning.
Here’s a few things to remember that might help;
Acknowledge the positives
It’s important to recognise the good things in your life as a means of staying positive. Sit down and make a list of all the things you’re grateful for, whether it be big things like your family or small things like the fact that it didn’t rain today. Get used to noting all the good things in your day to day life and don’t let your mind ruminate on the bad. So there was no hot water in the shower this morning, so what, don’t let it ruin your day. Put it out of your mind and focus on the fact that you had a clean pair of matching socks to put on. Get used to training your mind to imagining the positives under a spotlight and the negatives fading away in the darkness. It might take a while, but like your body, your mind needs training to get from strength to strength and soon it will become second nature.
Know that it gets better
This isn’t wishful thinking, it’s a guarantee. Never forget the kind of life you want or wish for, in it’s simplest form. Money in the bank, good friends, a happy family – as hard as it is, never lose sight of a brighter future.
You might have heard it before, but it’s true – you make your own luck, you create your own destiny. It’s very easy to blame ‘bad luck’ as the reason all the things have been going wrong for you, but you are the creator of your own life. Expand your knowledge and education and say yes to as many new experiences as you can. Keep moving forward, it might be uphill, but at least you're moving.
See your scars as strengths
It’s rare that anyone would go through life without some hardships and moments of pain and sadness. Realise that everyone has their own individual set of scars and that yours have taught you a unique combination of lessons that have made you who you are right now. These ‘scars’ build up something that is very rare, use that as a strength going forward, not a weakness.