13 Sh*tty Reasons To Dump Them

There are a whole variety of things responsible for leading you to dump someone. Too clingy, very loud, being a cheat. If someone's not right for you, you just know. For every perfectly feasible reason out there that you could possible have for dumping someone however, are thousands of shitty reasons. Read on and get some inspiration for yourself. Just don't say I told you.

1) You're Not Ready For A Relationship Despite Being 23 Years Of Age

You dear sir or madam, you need to grow the fuck up. Stat.

2) They Consider KFC To Be A Delicacy

Some people say the same about snails. Nobody will win this war.


3) They Drink Blue WKD

Have you been going out with a 13 year old?

4) You Think You'll Get Way Better

With an ego as large as yours, you should be so lucky.


5) There's A Justin Bieber Album On Their IPod

Actually, this is a pretty valid reason to dump them. What the hell were you thinking?

6) They Live More Than 15 Minutes Away

Lazy. This is not 1764. We have cars and stuff now.


7) Their Clothes Are Shit

Instead of dumping them like the massive dickhead that you oh so clearly are, why not take them shopping, suggest a wardrobe overhaul or failing all of that, just burn their stuff and act innocent?

8) You Have A Sneaking Suspicion That Their Sister Is A Bitch

So what if she is. You don't have to go out with her, after all. Even if she is a bitch.


9) They Don't Pay For Absolutely Everything

How shocking, this must be the 50's after all.

10) All Of Your Friends Are Single

So if Paddy jumped off the bridge...


11) They Play Too Many Sports

Yes being fit, toned and healthy is a massive no no. You're dead right on that one.

12) They Haven't Watched Breaking Bad

They have clearly been living under a rock for the past year. Forgive them these sins.

13) They Only Make You Laugh 15 Times A Day

Oh I wasn't aware that I was talking to a professional comedian here, congratulations. Perhaps pick a clown for your next relationship. That's bound to keep you laughing.

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Alison Keogh
Article written by
Alison decided to follow a sensible career route and chose to study Media. She happens to think of herself as a kind of Irish Beyonce after four Coronas, which usually results in her being deserted on the dance-floor by her loving friends. Her horrifically short attention span seeps into many aspects of her life, resulting in her half hearing important facts and hating people who walk at a leisurely pace.
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