Hungover, Awkward & Broke: The Dark Side of Christmas

Okay, so Christmas is a special time of year. There’s no denying that it’s a special time of year. But to be honest, it gets a bit monotonous. There are many aspects of Christmas which I truly adore. The food is great and I love being around my close family and friends. Unfortunately, that’s about the height of it. After the age of about 12 when you realize Santa Clause is actually your parents,  it's not quite the same. The weather is shit. There is an abundance of tedious small-talk to be done and you end up spending a fucking fortune.

Here are a number of reasons why there is quite a substantial dark side to Christmas:

  1. It’s Too Expensive

Christmas is probably the most expensive time of year. Between travel expenses, copious alcohol consumption and presents; budgeting tends to go out the window. I don’t mind buying people presents at all. In fact, I love doing it. But your bank account tends to look exceptionally bleak after buying presents for everyone... Which is shit.

  1. Alcohol Consumption

This is the bane of my existence on any given weekend. So, given the noticeable increase in social gatherings and occasions suited to alcohol consumption; it is safe to say I’m not a fan of this aspect. As well as this, everyone seems to let loose during the festive season. Old friends returning home etc. There is always an excuse just to get utterly shit faced. To add insult to injury, spending money and alcohol consumption complement each other... a lot. Oh, and you will have a ridiculous hangover and terrible fear. But, you're all used to that at this stage.



  1. Awkward Family Situations

Let’s face it. No one in their right mind likes talking to their great aunt Mary. No matter how experienced you are at dealing with people, extended family gatherings are always horrific. Everyone feels the same. No one wants to be there. To make matters worse, everyone always ends up getting stupidly drunk and really embarrassing, even the old ones. But then again, they are your family.

  1. Christmas Mass

No one likes mass, except like the pope and shit.

  1. The Anticlimactic Feeling When The Holidays Are Over

It’s the 3rd of January. The silly season is well and truly finished. You’ve spent a fucking fortune. Most of which you have absolutely nothing to show for. You’ve put on over a stone. You feel as though you’re about to drop dead from alcohol poisoning. You have made a number of half-hearted New Year’s resolutions. There is nothing to look forward to until summer.


Rudolph’s Advice: Embrace it. You are going to spend all your money and get completely shit-faced anyway. You may as well do it without feeling guilty. Enjoy the family time. Appreciate everything you have and think of the less fortunate and all that shit.

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Rudolph Brotherton
Article written by
Rudolph is an under-achieving, morally defunct, self-professed ladies man. His hobbies include sex, pugs and rock ‘n’ roll. He makes Johnny Bravo look like Postman Pat. He is the real deal. The original Heartbreak Kid. Looking to improve your game with the ladies? Listen very carefully...

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