The Stages Of Being Dumped

It's happened your happily ever after scenario just took a couple of steps backwards, that person you've trusted the last [insert time spent here] years has dropped a bombshell on you. You and them will cease to exist as a combined force, in a universe that has forsaken you...or something along those's the stages of being dumped...*sob :(

1. "You're whating with me?”

That's right we're done, I've had enough of a) the way you treat me like shit or b)the way you completely ignore me and expect me to just stay here and put up with it just so you can have sex when you want to.

2. "No you're not dumping me, I'm dumping you”

Denial. You can't dump me because I'm dumping you. You have no grounds for this and I'm the one in this relationship who's put up with more shit than you have..unfortunately you've just got to play it out. Getting dumped isn't exactly the best feeling in the world but if there's anything worth saving in it then it's your pride. Don't be childish, take it with a pinch of salt, turn around and walk right out of there with your head held high...easier said than done right!?


3. "This is actually happening.”

After the initial war of words subsides there is the realisation that you have actually unceremoniously been dumped.

4. "Living in squalor"

And so to the stages of trying to get over someone, where it all went wrong and all the fantastic plans you're going to put into action to fix it or get them back...


5. "Yeah, single again"

In between making all these super plans a thought crosses your mind, "hey, wait a minute, I might be trying my darndest to get my former sweetheart back but I am in fact single"... Like a new born deer you take one step at a time as you look to re-enter the world as a vulnerable single person

6. "Nope, still depressed, I want them back"

So a night on the tiles ended in pure and utter TEARS...Im going to change into all the things that I wasnt, and get rid of all my bad habits


7. "Acceptance"

Actually I don't need anyone, I'm actually fine on my own, plus with all the new habits I have and old ones I dropped, I feel amazing..actually.

8. "Me again", "kind of"

I'm single, in better shape and can do what I want...Jesus, why was I ever in a relationship in the first place.

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Ian Smith
Article written by
Ian is a contributing writer for CollegeTimes. He is currently partying his ass off for the Summer having spent the past 7 years at various colleges across the globe. While by no means an athlete, he considers himself a world class darts player... If you tweet him he will not respond.

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