A girls night out is kind of a big deal and not an event that should be taken lightly. A good GNO can make or break a friendship, and completely change a group dynamic, not always for the better. Every girls' night out has certain things that must happen for it to be a true girls' night out. Let us elaborate...
1. Super early preparation
You start getting ready about 6 hours before you're due to meet up at one of the girls' houses for pre-drinks. Organisation is key.
2. Choosing your outfit
You stand in front of your wardrobe in a state of silent hysteria at the prospect of having nothing to wear, despite rails and rails of unworn clothes. You're not really in the mood to show off your arms so you opt for some capped sleeves but that colour won't go with the shoes you want to wear so you settle on a long sleeved dress but you'll be too hot, plus that design will look too fussy with your jewellery but it's now 11pm and you have no time to do your make up right and you just know you will be single forever.
3. Makeup problems
You are on your nineteenth attempt at getting your liquid eyeliner even and contemplate just wearing sunglasses instead.
4. The pain of high heels
You arrive at your friend's gaff ready to get locko'd with your bottle of wine/vodka/Captain Morgans. Your feet are already aching from your heels. If we all just agreed to wear slippers out, none of us would be in this situation.
5. Gossiping about potential drama
You discuss the possibility of drama materializing; the appearance of exes/ex-friends/your ex's friends (Christ, somehow that's always worse) and then are genuinely surprised when actual drama occurs. Girls, it's a self-fulfilling prophecy.
6. "The drink is on its way!"
By now everyone is quite "merry", evident when you and your friend go to the jacks and she is going hell for leather with her bronzer. You're too drunk to know how to say it to her gently, so you just hope someone else will.
7. "Cabs are here!"
You all pile into a taxi, make friends with the driver who tells you about his wife and kids, and then demand he turn up 'that song!' You leave him no tip.
8. Getting in
You rock up to the club, pay the admission fee and then head straight for the toilets. Not before a quick furtive glance around the place to see who's out tonight though.
9. Your ex makes their entrance
About seven hours later you all head to the bar and order shots - but, wait!.. Is that your ex? Fuck. For fuck's sake. You discreetly alert your friends to their presence, and they all obey the code; not looking around to see.
10. Enter Mr. Creepy Guy
You all pile on to the dance floor but depart for the smoking area soon after Creepy Guy makes an appearance.
11. Love Goggles
You ask Ridey McRide in the navy jeans for a light despite the fact that your friend is waving one around and that you don't even smoke. If he looks at you whilst passing it to you, he fancies you. If he doesn't look, he's too shy. Obvs.
12. New friends
This is the point in the night where you lose your friends. You haven't a breeze who these new people are but they don't seem like murderers, so it's grand.
13. Things start getting messy
Someone vaguely familiar tells you that your friend is puking in the toilets. 'Ah, shur she'll be grand.'
14. Drama begins
Someone else is crying in the corner because a lad asked her for a cigarette and she thought he accused her of having Tourette's. 'Ah, shur she'll be grand.'
15. Cheating?! More drama!
And someone else has gone home with an ex - the one whom if she went near, you were to give her a good dig in the ribs. 'Ah, shur she'll be grand.'
16. Food, glorious food
Finally, some proper action. Come to Mama!
17. Hungover reminiscing.
The next day, you all fill each other in on what went down the night before. Standard.