Life

What College Students Tell Their Parents VS What They Really Mean

What college students tell their parents and what they really mean are two COMPLETELY different things. It's a black art most students learn to master, which involves "white lies", sneaky behaviour and masking your real college activities. Here's a few of the most common ones.

What they say: I need money for new college books.

What it really means: I need more money to feed my drinking habit. It's only Wednesday and I've already burned through 50 euro in the SU by skipping my lectures to play pool and drink pints with the lads. I do feel a little guilty by pretending that I need the money for books, but the other extreme is telling you the truth and having you give me a lecture on planning my finances. And I'm definitely not going through that again.

What they say: Of course I went to all my lectures.

What it really means: I hit the "snooze" button on my alarm after you left for work, pulled the covers back over me in bed, and slept til noon. Then I lounged into town, met up with my friends and had lunch. Went into my next lecture, doodled a bit in my book and whispered stupid private jokes to my friends to try and make them laugh out loud. Took a quit nap with my head down on the desk, and then I ditched my last lecture to see a movie, and had a beer in the SU before coming home.

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What they say: No, the results aren't out for another while.

What it really means: I've already got my results online and they were horrific. A few fails, and you're not going to be happy. Now I'll have to get up early every morning this week to try and ambush the post for when the results do come out!

What they say: No I wasn't still DRUNK when I got up for college this morning.

What it really means: Yes, I was absolutely smashed. I cannot for the life of me figure out how I even managed to find myself home last night. I don't remember even talking to you at the breakfast table this morning. Alcohol was emanating from my pores and I somehow managed to crawl into my 9am lecture. I'd say the drink probably helped me out on that front actually, as usually I would have just slept it out.

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What they say: I spent all day knuckling down in the library.

What it really means: I sat in the library with a group of friends and chatted amongst oursleves pretty loudly, not taking into consideration anyone else, and disrupting quite a few students who were actually working hard. After that I grabbed a quick (hour long) lunch and went back to my computer, where I repeatedly refreshed my Facebook newsfeed and re-read the same updates from my friends over and over. I plugged in my headphones and watched an episode of breaking bad before grabbing a lift home from my friend.

What they say: Mam, NOBODY does the readings!

What it really means: Nobody does the readings.

Ian Smith
Article written by
Ian is a contributing writer for CollegeTimes. He is currently partying his ass off for the Summer having spent the past 7 years at various colleges across the globe. While by no means an athlete, he considers himself a world class darts player... If you tweet him he will not respond.

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